These Colors Don't Match

Domestic Surveillance is an important tool in the war on terror...but it's also fun

The President listening in on soldier's Christmas calls home

It Was a Heck-of-A Year

The President says 2005 “was a good year for the American people” and it's easy to see why. If you were born rich it probably was, or if you had six weeks vacation.
If you knew you were never going to actually have to fight in a war.
If you were flying over New Orleans rather than wading through it.
If you didn’t have to wrestle through the Medicare prescription drug application.
If you didn’t have to pay for your own gas (or jet fuel).
If you didn’t have to drive the Hum Vee without the proper armor.
If you didn’t have to declare bankruptcy.
If you weren’t nominated to the Supreme Court.
If you didn’t have to convince the Senate to let your wife die with dignity.
If you didn’t receive bribe money from Tom Delay.
If you didn’t receive bribe money from Jack Abramoff.
If you didn’t receive bribe money from defense contractors.
If you didn’t have your cover blown.
If you didn’t have to take the fall for Dick Cheney.
If you didn't print everything that Chalabi told you.
If you didn’t get Rove off the hook.
If you weren’t an Eskimo.
If your son wasn’t sent home from Iraq in the baggage section of a commercial airplane.

I guess the President knows better than anyone how good a year we had… he read our emails.

War On Christmas, If You Want It

Religious Zealots should lay off this “War on Christmas” idea and stick to what they do best-molesting children, blowing up abortion clinics and destroying science education. Christmas is for unchecked commercialism, it has nothing to do with Jesus. He was dirt poor, although I think his progeny got the rights to his book.
That having been said, if progressives are going to be accused of waging war on Christmas, than we might as well. It could be fun. It would be about as logical as a war on drugs or terror, and probably more effective.
First we’ll have to secure the perimeter. I propose a ban on all reindeer immigration. Of course all suspicious –thick bearded- characters attempting to fly into the country will have to receive a full cavity-search for toys. Elves are small and probably relatively easy to kill, but the powerful Manger lobby could be tough to deal with. As far as dealing with the celebrants, we could use internment. And if that doesn’t work we could go back to lions.
Happy Holidays

Republicans in the House and Senate are proposing a Trillion dollars in tax cuts, most of which would go to the top 1% of the piss pyramid. It’s not as important to the American way of life as a missing blond, but a Trillion is a big number so I have been mulling over a Democratic response. I think it should go something like this…

Republican: “This tax relief is necessary to bring fairness back to the tax code.”

Democrat: “If this tax package passes we’ll raise an army, come to Washington and burn your fucking houses down.”

Republicans went through the trouble of knocking us unconscious so now they figure they might as well rape us. But they might not get away with it this time, the wind is shifting. Beltway druids are staring at the innards of civil society, trying to glean the answer to the eternal question of why the public has suddenly decided George Bush is a liar. I’ll give them a hint-It’s because of all the lying. Everything has it’s limits, even our stupidity. Now the cable’s fucked up so we’re getting off the couch, and Republicans don’t fare well when Americans are standing up.
Off with their heads, I say.

Pass the Paper

Yesterday all legitimate debate about whether or not to create a timeline for withdrawal of troops from Iraq ended. The Iraqis settled the argument, once and for all, by demanding one. The Bush administration responded immediately by claiming “multi national forces are in Iraq under a UN mandate” and by insinuation that that trumps any Iraqi mandate. This administration’s devotion to the UN is rivaled only by it’s dedication to the spread of democracy.
Republican’s have been using the suffering of Iraqis as a political lever for five years. They waved purple fingers in the face of all dissenting opinion and now they are playing the UN card to counter the wishes of the Iraqi government? So much for all that bull shit about the importance of an independent democratic Iraq. The demand for a US timetable for withdrawal is one of the precious few things that Kurds, Shiites and Sunnis have been able to agree on, but hey we got that UN mandate thing…
Over the next week Republicans are going to attempt to make this more complicated than it actually is-but make no mistake-we are either liberators, or conquerors. We can’t be both.
Many of us have suspected all along that the real Neo-con tendency was toward the latter. That the idea of spreading “Democracy” was an easily digestible prepackaged meal that would be too tempting for Americans to pass up. That, to the cabal at AEI, Enterprise and Empire are synonyms. The good news is that now there is a simple litmus test to determine our real intentions. Either we are liberators, and we respect Iraqi demands for a timetable, or we are not, and we don’t.
Or we’ll be distracted by Republican hucksters as they make a scale model of reality out of Origami.

Support Their Troops

I love Rumsfeld. He’s a bona fide psychopath. It’s almost cute. Today he chastised Wolf Blitzer for harping on “this one little detail” when Wolf asked him why, after three years, only one Iraqi battalion was ready to fight on it’s own. It would be easier to ignore this little detail if every official speech on the war didn’t include the phrase “as the Iraqis stand up, we will stand down”. Appearing on CNN with his human shield and concur-a-tron, General nodalot Sunday the Secretary of Defense dodged reality like a matador. At one point the pair actually tried to make the case that it was somehow incorrect to expect Iraqi troops to be able to fight without US support because after all, our own troops need US support to fight too. I’m changing my bumper sticker- “Support Their Troops”.

If Donkeys Could Talk...

Scene: Sunday morning- cable news

Republican Shill: (smugly) "I think it's disingenuous for democrats to criticize the war, after all they voted for it. "

Imaginary Dem: "That's a lie. The majority of Democrats in Congress voted against the war and the overwhelming majority of Democratic voters were against invading Iraq. "

Republican Shill: "Well It's disingenuous for those Democrats who did vote for the war-like John Kerry and Hillary Clinton- because they had the same intelligence as everyone else and they voted for the war. "

Imaginary Dem: "That’s a lie. George Bush had entirely different Information. This administration created their own intelligence groups, the Office of Special Plans and the White House Iraq Group. Those two intelligence groups took raw, un-vetted, intel from unreliable sources that they nurtured, bypassed Congress and the intelligence community, and spoon fed it to the President. George Bush had a different intelligence portfolio than the rest of the government. That’s why we heard repeated curve-ball inaccuracies by administration officials in the lead up to the war. The Intelligence Community said maybe and the Bush administration said definitely -those are two different things."

Republican Shill: "Well Bill Clinton came to the same conclusion..."
interruption (go ahead, try it it'll feel good…) Imaginary Dem: "That’s a lie. Bill Clinton looked at the available intelligence and decided not to invade Iraq. George Bush looked at the available intelligence and decided it wasn’t what he wanted, so he created his own intelligence groups to give him a justification for war. Republicans need to decide if they think this war is a good idea or not. If they think it was a good idea then they should stop trying to share the blame with Democrats. If they think it is a bad idea, or that it’s not working, then they should admit it and join Democrats in trying to find a way out"

-CO

Veteran's Day

Today the President’s Secretary…of State said, “…should Iraq become a place of despair, generations of Americans would also be condemned to fear".
Think about that for a minute. It might be the most incredible thing that has come out of the mouth of Condoleezza Rice concerning the Iraq war.
Considering that the single greatest responsibility that a President has is to protect and Serve the people of the United States, the Secretary’s statement should be cause sufficient to launch an independent investigation. Generations of Americans condemned to fear? Can you imagine if any one of the psychopathic war mongerers in the Bush camp had intimated to the citizenry before this war of choice that, if we happen to fail, generations of Americans would be forced to live in fear? Leave aside the 6 billion dollars a month. Block out the suffering of tens of thousands of mutilated American soldiers. Ignore, for a moment, the permanent anguish of those Americans and Iraqis who will never see their loved one again. And consider the magnitude of the Secretary’s statement. Fear itself was the tool that became technique in this President’s push for war. Fear itself was the axe that this administration held over the heads of anyone who doubted their assertion that there was no alternative. Fear itself was the stick that they used to flog the media into submission. And now fear itself is what we are being threatened with if we decide to cut our losses.
Iraq is Bush’s war, and he lost it. This Veteran’s Day as G. W. addresses a room full of people who actually fought for what they believed in, the President’s stock “stay the course”-“we will not rest” bull shit crawls out of his mouth like date-rape whispers.
It used to be annoying but now it’s murder. His fear is palpable… and intoxicating…and contagious, and it remains the only thing we actually have to fear.

Great idea for a blog Jess